Funny Stories for Dads

I’ll provide the funny stories. All you have to do is read ’em and laugh. It’s OK. I’ll wait for the game to end.

Why do dads need to laugh? In case you haven’t noticed, today’s dads are often marginalized in popular media. Watch any TV commercial. We’re usually portrayed as bumbling doofuses. In my case, it’s probably true, but I doubt it’s entirely accurate in your situation. You work hard to provide for your family and set a loving example for your children. It’s OK to relax and laugh every once in a while, right? Dads of the world unite! (Right after loading the dishwasher…)

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MARK’S LATEST BOOK

“BLOW THE MAN DOWN” is a hilarious romp through the 1980s and ’90s music business, both in Nashville and the mysterious Virgin Island of ill repute, St. Croix. Go to the book page or order your copy now!

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Latest Blog Post

037: Why being a dad is scary

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Being a dad can be downright scary, and I’m not just talking about the baby stuff. How you appear in the eyes of your impressionable 12-year-old son or daughter can be as terrifying as driving a newborn home from the hospital. Let me explain…

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Lists

034: The Top 5 ways to know you're too political

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If you have a scowl on your face every time you look in the mirror, and you're losing friends on social media at an alarming rate, there might be a problem. You may be too political. Here's a surefire way to find out.

027: My Top 12 Reasons Why I Hate CrossFit, Version 2.0

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This is the podcast version of my most popular blog post to date, written seven years ago this month. I've updated it to reflect my current situation, but all the good stuff is still there. If you either love CrossFit, love to make fun of CrossFit, or just love to make fun of anything, you'll enjoy it.

026: My Top 10 Areas Where American Common Sense has Gone AWOL

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The Meriam-Webster dictionary defines common sense as, quote, “sound and prudent judgment based on a simple perception of the situation or facts” unquote. OK. That’s pretty good but let me amend that with an even simpler definition: Common sense means not being a dumbass. Not being a dumbass is in short supply these days. Here's what your Great-Grandpa and I think about things.

Health and fitness stuff? Boom.

027: My Top 12 Reasons Why I Hate CrossFit, Version 2.0

, , ,
This is the podcast version of my most popular blog post to date, written seven years ago this month. I've updated it to reflect my current situation, but all the good stuff is still there. If you either love CrossFit, love to make fun of CrossFit, or just love to make fun of anything, you'll enjoy it.

Blog Version: Doofus Dad’s Top 9 Handy & Useful Tricks for Dealing with the Coronavirus

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Disclaimer: The following is me poking fun of something that is clearly serious and bad. I am aware that it is serious and bad, but choose to poke fun at it anyway because, well, I need to. You have now been legally disclaimed. As I write…

For a creative boost, take a saunter!

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Is being creative on a regular basis part of your job description? Yes? Sucks to be you. Don't get me wrong. There's no greater joy — to me, anyway — than creating something today that wasn't there yesterday, whether it's a song, a…

Children and parenting? Here you go.

035: Image is everything — even for moms and dads

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What is the image you project to the outside world? How we choose to see ourselves is pretty much how we act and how the world views us, so choose wisely!

025: My Top 6 Reasons Why Sending Your Kid to College is Weird and Unsettling

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Of the many milestones in the life of a parent, sending your kid to college ranks high in terms of both pride and angst. In other words, it will freak you the hell out. Here are my top 6 reasons why.

Holding Out Hope

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Most parents aren't professional child-rearing experts with advanced degrees in child psychology. Parents are just people. And just when you think parenting can’t get any more difficult or confusing, it does.

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