STORIES FOR DADS, ABOUT DADS.

I’ll provide the funny stories. All you have to do is read ’em and laugh. It’s OK. I’ll wait for the game to end.

Why do dads need to laugh? In case you haven’t noticed, today’s dads are often marginalized in popular media. Watch any TV commercial. We’re usually portrayed as bumbling doofuses. In my case, it’s probably true, but I doubt it’s entirely accurate in your situation. You work hard to provide for your family and set a loving example for your children. It’s OK to relax and laugh every once in a while, right? Dads of the world unite! (Right after loading the dishwasher…)

MARK’S BOOKS

Blow the Man Down

In the 1970s, Mark Johnson was a gangly North Carolina farm boy with a big imagination. An avid reader of Doc Savage pulp novels and Hardy Boys mysteries, Johnson knew he wanted adventure in his life. He just had no idea where to get it or how to escape the Christmas tree fields of the Appalachians. As a teenager, Johnson discovered music. Then, girls. These epiphanies would lead to an adventure even Johnson’s wild imagination couldn’t have predicted.

Follow along as Johnson navigates a heart-pounding and often hilarious odyssey through the 1980s and ‘90s music industry as a songwriter and club musician, both in fickle Nashville and the mysterious Caribbean island of ill repute St. Croix. Johnson reveals both the seductions and the hard truths of life in the world of entertainment.

Go to the book page or order your copy now!

TAKE ME TO THE BOOK PAGE!

Mr. Ledbetter’s Boots

A 95-YEAR-OLD TUSKEGEE AIRMAN intends to become the oldest known person to complete the iconic 40-mile trek to EVEREST BASE CAMP.

After narrowly surviving the crash of his P-51 Mustang into the Austrian Alps during WWII, then-18-year-old Raymond’s escape from certain death became a thing of legend and launched his 75-year obsession with mountaineering. Now, in defiance of the laws of aging, his sights are set on fulfilling a life-long dream — experiencing Mt. Everest with his own eyes and via his own two feet.

Hiking alongside Raymond through Nepal’s mystical Khumbu is young journalist Joe Vogler, who hopes to make his mark in the world of social-justice news. Little does Joe know that Raymond’s old hiking boots hold a historical secret that will turn the adventure on its head.

Get it on Amazon HERE.

Read about Doofus Dad himself

Go now

Latest Blog Post

9 things that are better now than in the ’70s and ’80s, Pt. 2

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Welcome to Part 2 of this list. If you haven’t yet read Part 1, go read it first. Really! Don’t go any further because there’s a monster at the end of this sentence! Oh, never mind, that’s just me. Anyway, go read Part 1. I’ll wait. (Twiddling thumbs, whistling a song that isn’t really a […]

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Lists

The Top 10 Awkward Pre-School Moments for Dads

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Fatherhood is a lot easier in theory than in practice. Prior to actually meeting and interacting with their first kid, most first-time fathers imagine themselves as a combination of Sheriff Andy Taylor from “The Andy Griffith Show” and…

My Top 10 Reasons Why Bohemian Rhapsody Might Be the Greatest Rock Song Ever

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When word began spreading across social media that a biopic was being made about Queen singer Freddie Mercury, I was excited. It seemed to have the makings of something great and any movie that takes me back to the ‘70s is OK by me. (It is…

The Top 6 Ways to Cope When Your Teenager Drives Solo the First Time

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The day that your teenager gets their driver’s license and drives a substantial distance solo for the first time is interesting for a parent. There are other adjectives I could’ve chosen other than “interesting.” Appropriate choices would also be horrifying, terrifying, nauseating, and post-traumatic-stress inducing.

Health and fitness stuff? Boom.

Burpees or back surgery: you decide!

My back hurts. As I write this, I'm shifting around in my office chair to find a comfortable position, because couple of hours ago, I completed a Crossfit WOD (workout of the day) that involved a bunch of deadlifts.  It's funny that…

Crossfit and aging: The value is in the TRYING

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On August 27 of 2013, I wrote a satirical blog called “Top 12 Reasons Why This 47-year-old HATES Crossfit.”  It wasn't any big statement, but just an attempt to crack up my wife, which is the goal of the majority of my writing.  As…

Top 9 reasons why I should be the ‘Face of Crossfit’ instead of Rich Froning

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So Froning is essentially the “Face of Crossfit." The Reebok/Crossfit people must be living charmed lives, because Froning is handsome, articulate, funny, and by all accounts, a very nice guy. However, I’ve given this some serious thought, and I’ve come to the conclusion that I, Mark Johnson, would be a better “Face of Crossfit" than Mr. Froning. Here are the top 9 reasons why.

Children and parenting? Here you go.

The Top 9 Tips/Observations of a Disney First-Timer

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On Feb. 21, 2016, my family embarked on an earth-shattering, mind-bending, week-long, first-time-ever vacation at the Happiest Place on Earth: Disney World. It is now about a week and a half since we returned, and I'm writing the blog that…

The Top 10 Christmas Shows, period, the end.

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If you're like me, you don't need any help deciding which Christmas shows to watch.  You know what you like and what you don't. So why would you come here to read my "Top 10 Christmas Shows, period, the end"?  Easy.  So you can either…

Ava’s Zamperini speech

After winning the 4-H Public Speaking competition in her school club, my 10-year-old daughter, Ava, competed Thursday night (12/13) in the Rutherford County competition.  Much to my surprise and delight, she chose Louis Zamperini as her topic.…